Colchester Misogynist Poets Association Manifesto

The text below is the manifesto of the Colchester Misogynist Poets Association; a sacred code devised out of frustration (both sexual and intellectual) and the desire to break down the narrow boundaries and false ideals constructed by the modern pseudo-intellectuals. 

All those wishing to belong to this budding organisation must abide by our tenets.

I. This organization is founded on the belief that all arses are nice arses. This will be stated at the beginning of all meetings and is a non-negotiable condition of membership.

II. If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the fight is over.

III. No shirts, no shoes.

IV. Poetry submitted to the Association becomes property of the Association, who retains the right to publish it on public forums, crediting the author(s).

V. All appearances before parliament (British or otherwise) will be carried out by the president of the organization. If for whatever reason the president is not available to attend, a delegate will be appointed by the members of the society to take on this duty.

VI. Adjectives are for pussies.

VII. Freedom of speech comes before political correctness.

VIII. Any attempt to silence the views of others will be taken as a violation of the Association's charter and will be punishable by forceful expulsion through the use of gravel.

IX. Never judge a book by its cover, unless there are tits on it.

X. Colchester Misogynist Poets Association has no room for misogyny. Any members found to be openly misogynist will be banished from the Association forever.

XI. No racial impairment will be discriminated against, no matter how comical.

XII. Intolerance will not be tolerated.